Hidden Messages

I'm so tired and should be in bed. But, Elyssa had a soccer game at 7:45! Why do they do that to 6 year olds? Crazy. Anyway, she's eating and I've wanted to get this written down, so here I go. God is amazing! Duh. I'm such a brainiac. I was a bit mad at Him - He wasn't allowing my life to go the way I wanted it to go. I know what's best for me, right? Right (with lots of sarcasm). I haven't been to church in a month. I'd wake up on Saturday and automatically say - I'm not going. I thought if I avoided God then maybe He'd see that I knew best. Ha! Part of it is that I'm not part of Homebuilders anymore and haven't gone to the Single Parent class but twice. I'm scared. I HATE going into places alone! Anyway, through some awesome conversations (emails actually) with a friend I met recently, I was encouraged to get back to church. The title of the sermon was Powerful Evangalism or something like that. I thought - well, this isn't really what I need to hear right now. (I know best, remember?) God, in His amazing wisdom, had a different message for me. Dr. Graham starts teaching from Isaiah 54:1 about a barren woman telling her man to stretch out the tent because many children are on the way. "Great," I'm thinking, "More baby stuff. I don't want to be reminded that I want a husband and more kids." I'm so negative! Of course, Dr. Graham was leading us toward how powerful our witnessing should be so that our Christian family can grow. BUT - God had something more in mind for me. I skimmed ahead in Isaiah 54 just to see what else was going on. Check out verse 5: "For the Maker is your husband - the Lord Almighty, is His name." WOW! That's all I could think. I kept reading it over and over, with tears in my eyes. I had no idea that verse was in there. Once I picked my jaw up off my knees, I continued reading. Verse 6: "'The Lord will call you back as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit - a wife who married young only to be rejected,' says your God." There goes the jaw dropping to my knees again. I look around - did God have Isaiah write that just for me? Unbelievable! And then I got to verse 10 which is up by the title of my blog. Did He have a hidden message for me or what? Now, I'm not totally accepting my singleness - I'm trying to. I downloaded some sermons from The Village about singleness (on my new video IPOD that I got for free!) - the sermons are very good if you're single and reading this. Maybe single is where God wants me to be. Obviously that's where He wants me right now. I hope and pray that's just for now and not forever. But I take great comfort in the fact that He is my Husband. It says it right there! I mean, I always knew He is the Groom and the church is His bride - but there is Isaiah telling me thousands of years in the past that God is my Husband. And Isaiah's telling me that He knows me - knows that I married young and that I was rejected and that I was deserted and am distressed in spirit. And it's OK. God still wants me! Awesome, right? So keep your eyes open for those hidden messages - you never know what God wants to tell you.