I have to share a new Stupid X story.
When I was driving back to the airport in Chicago, X calls. He starts rambling on about something and then asks me if I had ever though of making a big move?
I said, "Huh?"
He rambles some more - something about how when my dad and grandma die, my mom will most likely live with me. Did I think it might be possible that we'd make a big move - like away from Texas?
I said, "Huh?"
I asked him if they were thinking about moving to New York. That's where they are both from - Stanton Island. (Why'd I marry a Yankee? Sheesh!) He is feuding with his family so he doesn't speak to them at all. He doesn't allow Elyssa to see her grandparents or aunts/uncles/cousins. Isn't that sad? All of the wife's family is up there. There's really no point in them being down here. So they are talking about moving.
He's asking me if I'll move to New York also! Can you believe it? "Sure, I'd love to leave everything I know and move. I'll leave my job and my friends and my church to go live in a place that costs more to live where I will know no one and where it's very doubtful that I would be able to get a teaching job and where almost everyone is Catholic (no offense to all you real Catholics out there). That sounds like a great plan! And I know my mom is just dying to leave the only place she's ever lived and move up north" Ha.
I just don't get him sometimes. Of course, my first thought of him moving is that I'd hardly ever have to see him. Yipee! Then I had the selfish (very selfish) thought of how I'd never get a break from parenting. Then I thought about how devastated Elyssa will be if this happens. She's got a step-sister she loves and a half sister who is only one. They are pregnant again - did I ever mention that? So that'll be 3 siblings that she will never get to see. They will grow up as a little family and Elyssa will be the outsider. It makes me want to cry. I don't worry about her going up there for extended periods of time - he won't keep her an entire month. She'd go for a few weeks at the start of summer and then again at the end of summer. I can totally handle that. But she'll be an outsider over time. She doesn't deserve that. She didn't ask for this. You know?
Poor kid.
3 comments:
I can't really state what I'm thinking here... but there are some interesting things going around in my brain about this one... giminy christmas... is he insane???
He just thinks of only himself. It's funny now. But imagine living with this for 9 years! I used to think I was the crazy one. I'd do everything I could to make him happy - even if it meant that I had to be unhappy. What a sad life I had and didn't even really know it was so bad. I just thought that's the way it was. You know?
Elyssa will have to work through all that on many levels - feelings of abandonment will be one of them. She will need you to feed truth into her so she does not believe the lies the enemy will try to fill her head with. She is surrounded by people/family that love her deeply. How blessed she is.
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