1 Peter 4: 1-2Is it an evil desire because it's human? I'm trying to live in God's will.
Therefore, since Christ suffered in His body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.
1 Peter 4:12-13 Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when His glory is revealed.So I should be rejoicing that I am "suffering." And guys, please don't get me wrong - this suffering of mine? It's nothing compared to what some people are suffering. It's a joke really. It's a selfish I WANT kind of attitude. Maybe that's the deeper question behind it all. How do I get rid of my selfish attitude?
Colossians 3:1-5 Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory. Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature. . . ."Grrrrr - That one's not fun to read. That's my answer right there. Set my heart on things above. It's so HARD!
1 Corinthians 7:34 An unmarried woman is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world - how she can please her husband."Obviously, Paul didn't think people should get married. Come on Paul - cut us some slack here. All of chapter 7 is about who should not get married. It is good for a man not to marry. It's good for widows and the unmarried to stay unmarried. Grrrr. I don't like it. On a side note, verse 15 was very comforting at the start of my divorce: "But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances."
OK - to sum up - I'm not supposed to worry about this stuff. I supposed to keep my mind on what's above. I'm to focus on God. And I can read 1 Corinthians 7:9 "But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." That's kind of funny, right? Maybe I'm "burning with passion" so God will allow the right fantastically cute Christian man to fall into my life. (Please God? Let the right fantastically cute Christian man fall into my life.)
3 comments:
OK, Miss Erin, you have my head completely spinning on this one. It appears that you're getting weary of "battling" the deep desire you have to be loved and married, so you're beginning to succumb to the idea (I would argue NOT placed there by God) that the desire to love and be loved is possibly "evil". God DESIGNED us for community and love. He created us as communal people - He created woman out of man's rib so that Adam could have a "worthy" and acceptable mate on earth - desiring a Godly, healthy, sexual marriage is NOT an evil desire and don't let Satan start jacking with your thoughts there. God put that desire there, so how could it be evil? He designed you to have those desires... it seems like the conflict is that He has those desires in you, but He hasn't offered up that mate yet, and this journey is getting exhausting and lonely and you don't think you can see the end, so maybe it isn't right. Keep the faith - in God... fundamentally, the desire of your heart is His will - I see it in everything I read - you have different physical desires, but if you go back and read your posts - your heart's desire is God's will for your life and He knows that and He's honoring that, but just like Job (as you referenced) just because you're in His will and exactly where He wants you to be, that doesn't mean that He's not allowing the struggle to take place. I truly feel like especially right now, there's a bit of a spiritual struggle and Satan's throwing a lot confusion at you. You're desires are pure (you know what I mean - the one's that want the Christian husband, etc etc =). But, take a look at Song of Solomon and read what he says about his love - his bride... that's some R rated stuff, FULLY Godly, FULLY pure and FULLY smiled upon by God. The world has made those desires skewed and ugly, but in the right circumstance - the one you want, they are pure and beautiful and ALL OVER the Song of Solomon. Also, the letter that Paul wrote to the church in Corinth - in context (because I had questions about that, too) - Paul was a person (first of all) that God called to be single - Paul was satisfied and happy with that and felt as though He was in God's will... with you - God put different and unique desires in you - you aren't Paul - there are Paul's out there, but you ain't him! Back to the Church... the church was in a rebuilding phase and was falling under a lot of sexual misconduct and they were getting distracted by thier lusts and infighting - at the time the energy of the people needed to be on reconstructing the church and its service to God, so he was writing a letter trying to say, "keep focus on rebuilding the church, and not on each other, but if you have to focus on each other, make Godly". And, I would say you can take a lesson from that if you want, but I think that your ARE staying focused on God... its painful sometimes, but you're doing a GREAT job of it and you aren't falling into immorality out of your frustration. I'm SURE I don't remember that story specifically. God also identified Christ as the Groom and the Church as His Bride - I don't think you need to burden yourself with wondering if the desire you have for the mate is wrong - it ISN'T - you've just been running a marathon that seems to be getting longer and longer and you're tired and wondering if you should have really started the race to begin with. I hope I'm not making any assumptions... but you are so amazing to me and even in your weariness, you're looking to God and asking Him if you're on the right track and if you're understanding Him and if not, can He help you do that - ALL the right answers and ALL the difficult ones. I love you SO much and pray for you EVERY day!! Again, I hope I don't sound INSANE, and hope my facts in Corinthians isn't too far off - I think its PRETTY close! =) Whatever happened to simply being married to Bo and Luke Duke and getting them out of the evil grasp of Boss Hogg!
I never meant to imply that I thought the desire to love and be loved was evil. I know that's from God. I guess I was trying to ask if my desire for a touch and a kiss is "evil" because . . . well, I don't know. I don't think evil is the right word. I used it because it was in the Bible. But here's my big question - why does He put this desire in me so strongly but not allow it to come true for me? That sounds so wimpy and weak. I don't mean it like that. What it all boils down to is that I'm so damn lonely. That's it. Simply said. And that's wimpy and weak too. I've seen an amazing example of the type of man I want, but it is still out of reach for me. I just want to kiss someone. But I might be destined for the cat lady position. I hear it's available. Why couldn't my marriage to Luke Duke have held? Riding my bike down the street screaming "yee-haw" at the top of my lungs. Those were the good ol' days with some good ol' boys, who never meant any harm.
I know what you're saying... and truly how you're feeling - before Trae I was in the exact same place (emotionally) feeling the exact same things and had the exact same questions and frustrations. God got me through it (with a lot of time, faith, prayer... and counselling =), but He did get me through it - and He loves me NO MORE than he loves you. Its a painful and long process, but He'll will - the "problem" is that He governs the clock!
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